Top 10 Badass Pokémon (Who Actually Suck)
As Pokémon gain experience, they evolve into stronger, usually more intimidating forms, leading to some awesome designs. But you can't always judge a book by its cover; several ferocious-looking fighters are surprisingly lackluster when their stats, types, and abilities are put to the test—which companions fail to impress? Here are ten sleek yet fragile Pokémon!
At first, Regigigas seems amazing—he's the first Normal legendary, the leader of the Hoenn Regi trio, and he wields a mighty 670 stat total 670—what's not to like?
Well, Normal doesn't offer much offensive power (it's not a very useful same-type attack bonus), but the real problem is his terrible Slow Start ability. This halves Gigas's attack and speed for the first five turns he's in battle, making him surprisingly slow and underpowered. Heck, even Bulbapedia (the biggest Pokémon wiki) notes he has more in common with Slaking (who can only attack every other turn) than most legendaries.
At the end of the day, he's still better than some non-legendaries by sheer stat totals (his defenses are solid), but one of if not the worst mythical Pokémon.
I really want to like Sharpedo, both because of his fierce design and strengths: he has no quad weaknesses, several resistances, fair abilities, great attack with decent speed, and a solid mega form. So what's the issue?
Well, his overall stat total is only 460, but more than that, Sharpedo has terrible defense and special defense (40 in each, worse even than Charmander), meaning he just can't take hits. And while his typing has several resistances, it also has many weaknesses, so it's not hard for savvy trainers to exploit, and a poor move pool doesn't help.
Sharpedo might be passable for the main quest if you're dead-set on him, but when it comes to competitive battling, he's not up to par, especially with Greninja offering a much better Water/Dark creature once gen 6 hit.
Sneasel looked cool when he debuted in generation 2, showcasing its then-new Dark type, but his poor stat total and bad typing greatly hindered him. In generation 4, he gained Weavile as a new evolution, which improves his stat total, but maintains his typing issues—Ice is terrible on defense, and coupled with Dark, you've got a quad weakness to common Fighting attacks, plus weaknesses to Rock, Bug, Fairy, and more.
Throw in poor defenses and lackluster abilities and Weavile's a glass cannon, able to maybe get one decent hit in before falling.
Scyther just looks awesome, easily one of the coolest Bug-types with his arm-blades. His stat total is fair if not great at 500, but I do like its allocation, neglecting special attack to favor speed and physical attack. However, it's still outdone by many other sweepers, and Bug/Flying is a bad type combo with a quad weakness to Rock (another popular aggro type) plus several other elements.
To be fair, Scyther gained new evolution Scizor when gen 2 came out. And while Scizor's Bug/Steel typing is better, it still has a quad weakness (Fire) and is almost more an alternate form than a true evolution, as his stat total remains at 500. Scizor's also tricky to get, requiring you to trade Scyther while he holds a Metal Coat item.
Both intimidating and a little silly at the same time, Exploud is the final form of Whismur, evolving from Loudred at level 40. But despite his three-tier family and late evolution level, his base stat total is a mediocre 480 (490 as of gen 46)—not dreadful, but far from good. The stat allocation is bad too, as they're fairly evenly spread (slightly favoring attack), preventing Exploud from having a clear role in battle.
Plus, his damage is hindered by the fact that he'll never get both STAB and weakness damage (since nothing is weak to Normal, using it for STAB won't hit any weaknesses). Add in lackluster abilities and there just isn't any reason to pick Exploud over better options.
Type: Ground (Alolan form is Ghost/Fire)
Marowak gained fame as the Pokémon Team Rocket kills in Lavender Tower, where players battle her ghost. While tragic, it showcases her resilience and spirit, and many years after gen 1, she would gain a new Ghost/Fire Alolan form in gen 7.
But no matter which one you use, Marowak just isn't good. With a mere stat total of 425, she feels like a mid-way evolution rather than a final form (some believe she might have been intended as the pre-evolution of Kangaskhan), and Ground just isn't a great defensive type. To be fair, Cubone and Marowak are the only creatures who can equip the Thick Club held item, which doubles their physical attack, but it's just not the third form the family needs to stay relevant.
With new units like Tropius and Sceptile, Hoenn introduced some awesome-looking Grass dinos, but unlike Sceptile, Tropius is bad. Like, really bad. His stats don't match his appearance, falling at a mere 460, and like Exploud, they lack focus, making Tropius below-average at everything, especially speed.
His typing makes things worse, bearing a quad weakness to Ice (another prevalent attack type), plus weaknesses to Rock, Fire, and more, with few resistances to balance it out. Tropius really needs a new evolution or at least mega form to have any role in battle, but to his credit, he does make a good HM slave, able to learn Flash, Cut, Fly, and Rock Smash. However, since HMs aren't needed as of gen 7, even this small saving grace is no longer relevant.
Most games offer early-accessible single-evolution mammals who work okay in the short term but lag behind the farther you quest, like Raticate, Furret, and Bibarel. Both Linoone and Mightyena fill that role for Hoenn; you'll score Mighty by leveling a Poochyena to 18.
But other than a fast evolution, Mightyena has little going for it, with a pathetic 420 stat total that's too evenly-distributed to be interesting, and ever since Fairy-types arose in gen 6, Dark has another weakness to worry about. While I do like Mightyena's Intimidate ability, automatically lowering your foe's attack when he enters battle, it's far too little for another creature who desperately needs a third evolution.
With a unique yeti-like design and new type pairing, Abomnasnow showed promise, and he wields an excellent ability: Snow Warning. This automatically causes hail weather, which damages non-Ice types, and Abomnasnow also a mega form to consider.
But things go sour from there: stat total is only a fair 494, and yet again, it's too balanced; with even attack and special attack, Abomnasnow can hit either up-close or indirectly but excels at neither. He also has a late evolution at level 40, and one of the game's worst type pairings, bearing a quad weakness to Fire plus weaknesses to Rock, Fighting, and many more, so he won't last long enough to make good use of his free hailstorm.
Glalie looks awesome, and his shiny form gives him glowing red eyes for an even scarier design, but he's just not worth it. He doesn't evolve from Snorunt until level 42, and even then, you've only got a stat total of 480, with the points completely evenly spread, 80 in everything. So while there aren't any glaring flaws, there aren't any big strengths either.
Ice is a good aggro type, but it's easily the worst defensive element in the game, only resisting itself yet having four weaknesses, and none of Glalie's abilities pick up the slack. A mega form and alternate evolution path (leading to Ice/Ghost Froslass) are better than nothing, but not enough to save this deceivingly-cool slacker.
Which Pokémon do you think is worst?
Gauging a Pokémon's Power
With many mechanics involved in battles, Pokémon are often more than they appear. Maybe one's stat total isn't great, but it's spread well, or maybe they have an excellent ability/type pairing to balance it out.
Yet today's slackers need a boost, whether a simple stat increase, new evolution, or alternate form, to help their bite match their bark. But for now, vote for your weakest link and I'll see you at our next Pokémon countdown!
© 2020 Jeremy Gill